captain lame
So I've come to the conclusion I'm lame. I sit here and read all of your blogs and read about your lives and I feel like i'm a big lazy lame ass. Seriously....Most my friends that blog have one or two kids and some also have jobs along with the mommy job...yet still blog and still have time to cook and try recipes and find fun things to do for yourselves and/or your kids...or have time to travel....AND me...i feel like i do none of those things...its a good day if i go to the gym or if i take the time to blog....I only work 3 days a week or more if i pick up extra but i have a husband who enjoys cooking (which i really dont most of the time) and who's so anal that he cleans more than me...So where does this leave me? Before i was married I danced, did artsy and crafty stuff, was at the gym almost everyday, spent lots of time w/ friends and now i find myself in a funk....and i think its been like this for a while now....
Its hard to make friends, believe it or not. It would be so easy for me to just move where i have established friends...it makes me jealous and sometimes sad to see all the photos of friends and their families getting together (b/c they live close). They do fun things....can just pick themselves up and say lets go the park with ....(fill in the blank).....*sigh*..I have yet to find people to hang out with ....I recently went out and also had gone to a "friends" house for some dinner, drinks and kareoke (sp?)...it was SO much fun...but then i called them recently to see if anyone wanted to get lunch and see a movie and no one called back???? (so i went by myself--which is not a problem or new for me) i dont get it...i was kinda bummed....makes you feel bad and like you're not fun or something? i dunno....i go through this no and again and i get all poopy.....
I also keep telling myself i'm going to look into classes...you know like art or dance classes just so i can do something for myself and either i lose motivation or something....ahhhhhhhh..
Anyway this started b/c i found myself being envious of all you, my friends, that seem to have it together and that your lives seem "full" and by full i mean full of joys, accomplishments, passions, and zest...
i think i need to take sometime to find that again.....any suggestions on how to go about that?
posted by stacy @ 7:21 PM
11 Comments:
Stace! Research dance classes and take one. Or find one of those exercise boot camps. Or come visit me more often! I have been feeling in a funk lately too. Maybe you and I should go do a girl thing. Would you be interested?
I know how you feel. When I graduated I was so happy that I would have a lot of free time. Now I don't really do anything productive with my free time. I was always in some kind of activity and now watching TV seems to be my only activity. Haha!
I think it is harder to make friends as you get older. I always had a lot of friends growing up and now it seems like most of my good friends live in different cities. Bob makes friends so easily, but I think it is different for women to find friends.
I would definitely look into dance or art classes. I was looking into some cake decorating classes recently. Could be fun!
Jen
Well, I don't typically share this kind of stuff (some crazy defense mechanism I guess), but I have broken down a lot over the past couple years too. Sometimes everything seems so perfect (and that's usually when I'm motivated to blog), and sometimes I cry and think how did I get here? I think life is weird like that. I've also realized that when depression hits, it turns you into someone different than you are and you have to hold onto that thought until you get through it. And then, when you're feeling better, try to do whatever you can to get yourself out of that funk. I was always impressed with the crafty stuff I saw you do in college. You definitely have a great creative side. Joining classes (dance, art, whatever) would definitely be a great way to do something for yourself and meet new friends. It's so important to take care of yourself and your needs (and so easy to not do). Everyone in your home will benefit from a happy Stacy. Good luck and keep us posted!
I think Nikki is right. I think we mostly post when we have great happy things to share. When we are sitting on our beds crying and wondering how we are going to get through another day we don't!
I think this makes our blogs tend to portray a "perfect" life that doesn't exist.
We've been in DE a year and I still feel that way! There are spouse groups, but there is something about 'organized fun' that makes me squeemish & awkward(sp). That said, there is something about being forced to meet friends on your own (not through husband).
Have you thought of going back to school part time? I'm pretty quiet & antisocial at times, so it wasn't until winter session/spring semester that I really started making friends with my classmates.
In Charleston I took a knitting class once...there was only one other person in the class under 40 and we hit it off. Dance classes sound like a lot of fun, too!
When Sean and I lived in CA we hated it because we didn't know anybody. Arielle was too far away to hang out with regularly .. so we hung out in beautiful Laguna Beach .. trying to figure out how to meet people as a couple. Its so strange, to try to make new friends .. especially as a couple .. because its not like you can just walk up to another couple at a bar .. and try to strike up a conversation .. or at least neither of us could/would do that.
I'm on the same page as everybody else .. join a class doing something you like .. it makes alot of sense to find somebody with a common interest and you might find a friend. I joined a group on meetup.com called 'Mel-boring no more' .. they have all sorts of neat kayaking trips and adventurist things to do. I have yet to sign up for anything, but hopefully one day I will.
Or .. join a parent group .. growing up my mom met some great people that way in the Pines. She's still great friends with one of them to this day and that friend keeps in touch with all the others. They used to have adult parties, and fun kid trips to parks and stuff. Well that's what I remember about them :)
Do you have a climbing gym or any other outdoorsy thing in your area? We have very close friends that Barry met at our climbing gym. They became climbng buddies and Jen ended up in my wedding. I've noticed that people who do outdoor sports are usally laid back, all around fun people to be around that enjoy meeting new people. Love ya!
Do you have a climbing gym or any other outdoorsy thing in your area? We have very close friends that Barry met at our climbing gym. They became climbng buddies and Jen ended up in my wedding. I've noticed that people who do outdoor sports are usally laid back, all around fun people to be around that enjoy meeting new people. Love ya!
Hey Stac-it's hard for dad and I to meet people too. I am planning on going to the Tamarac Community Center to check out some classes.I bet your Y offers classes. How about Belly Dancing? Love
I know you feel a bit down but please stop comparing your life to everyone else. Do what makes you happy and if that is a dance or art class, GO FOR IT. But please stop thinking other people are more interesting, active etc. You have a beautiful family and you are an amazing person so do things because they make you happy, not because you think others are doing it and are happy.
I love you cousin.
XOXO
You can always come hang out in Charleston with me, or we can do Myrtle when we both have a few days off. I feel the same as you though, I don't have any friends here yet either. I thought about taking an adult tap dancing class....but then I think it would be dorky and I would probably meet dorky people there. I want someone to goto lunch with. Also, I keep having dreams about working at Fairfax again and everyone is new and no one remembers me, that makes me sad too. I miss Stacey and Landon :-(
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